Tuxedo Mobilization Plan

My older brother (and yes, he really does look MUCH older) is getting married soon. There is a whole story to how he met his bride-to-be. The story includes a chapter about how I had worked hard to never let them meet and was successful for many, many years. Somehow, I got my party invitations mixed up and scheduled them both to be at the same party. It was my fault for not doing a better job of managing my party lists. They met, he somehow fooled this good friend of mine that he will make her happy, and they decided to get married.

Anyways, I got an email from my brother today with his "Tuxedo Mobilization Plan" for the wedding. His email requests that I get measured for my tux. He further states in his email that:

  • I have no choice on color or design, but I do get to keep the socks
  • I am allowed to wear suspenders, but they must be approved by a wedding committee
  • It may be a good idea for those still growing (was this a fat joke?) to wait until close to the wedding to get measured
  • Corrective actions will be taken for those that do not meet their tuxedo-based goals (damn,  I think this means that I will lose part of my bonus)

OK, fine. I will meet the goal that he set, but he blew it. He didn’t say anywhere in his email that I actually have to wear the tuxedo.

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